♥ Li Kee Chee♥

I was heading to the office at late evening after attending the OUSA Supervisors of the Year Function. I needed to finish up some work that I left off. I walked towards the automatic door but it didn't open. Oh right. It was after hours.

I needed my swipe card access.

YES! I have it with me.

And I scanned it.

Hmmm. It asked for a door access PIN. Each swipe card has a unique door access PIN and we got it on a slip with our student ID at the start of the year.

I searched for the slip in my wallet. I couldn't find it.

It was getting cold. I am gonna try and key in any number that I can think of at that moment.

1234

1111

1122

3344

.

.

.
.

.

.

0000 (am I able to reset it?)

.

.

.

.

.

.

(after 10 minutes)

-BEEP-

-DOORS OPENED-

YES! That feeling of accomplishment.

Luckily it wasn't those annoying security where they only allow 3 tries and locked me out.

So I walked in happily.

But what was that number that I just keyed in?

This post is dedicated to my good friend, Wong Teng Jong, who is a bright, kind, smart and humble guy that I first met back in 2009.

Teng Jong was my closest friend in college. I met Teng Jong at Sunway University College when we were doing Cambridge GCE A-levels programme. We were in different class at first but I joined Teng Jong's class two weeks later. Since then, we always hang out together with the rest of the people in class. We would usually have lunch together and we see each other in the class everyday.


In fact, we sat next to each other almost everyday in the class too. Because he lives around my house area, we started car pooling to class. So we ended up going to and fro college almost every single day especially in second year. We would talk about anything especially during the journey to and fro college. He usually drives me to college and I can't remember exactly why. I vaguely remember that he will always text me in the morning saying "I'm coming to pick you". Sometimes he wakes up late, and when that happen, I would text or call him, offering to pick him up. However, he always insisted to pick me up. When we arrived at college, he would drop me off and he will look for parking by himself so that I "won't be late" or I "don't have to walk far to college". He was once late for exam because he couldn't find parking and I can't concentrate during that exam until he walked in. Well, I shouldn't be worried at all because he is such a smart guy. He is lazy, I have to admit. He does his homework last minute but he would have the right answer. Like I have to copy his answer sometimes. Even if he don't, he will make up with some explanation and it kinda make sense..at least to me HAHA. Sometimes the class can be quite boring so I would disturb him in the class or he would distract me with some acts. I still remember that his iPod got confiscated because he was caught using it in chemistry class. And he had to score 60 for chemistry in order to get it back lol. He did managed to score it in the end haha. He will also remind me if I get too serious in class. "Eh why you so serious lah". That's what he would say. One of his favourite act was to bend his thumb backwards touching the wrist. Up till today, I am still amazed by it.

I still remember one of the funny moments we had. One day, I was driving Lily's manual car back from college and we were stucked in traffic jam. That moment when I drove manual car for the first time after I passed my driving test. Stucked in a traffic jam. Did I also mentioned that it was on a slope? The car started to roll back on a slope when I wanted to move forward. Lily and I were screaming and we didn't know what to do. At that time, Teng Jong, who was sitting behind the seat was really calm. He reached out for the handbreak and pulled it just in time. If it wasn't for him, I would have hit the Mercedes car, and I don't know if I can afford to pay for that.

He is a very supportive friend as well. I was surprised that he came to watch my modeling competition. I recalled being really tired and I already gave up before the competition. I was the worst one to do catwalk in the class and was punished to do 20+ catwalk at training. However, my group of friends, including him, still came to support me in the competition and I made it to Top 10!


Their support means a lot to me because I felt like I need to at least try and do my best before giving up. I really appreciate that he gave up some of his time to come and watch my competition. He also came to watch me in one of the fashion show. It was really a small show, and it was for charity. But he still came, and he took care of my bag that day.

Teng Jong and I performed for the senior graduation ball. I did silly mistake and I couldn't get up to the dancer's shoulder on time. Instead, they had to lift me up but I was falling. Luckily someone supported me with a lap. And I remembered looking at Teng Jong's face. He gave me a shock, blur and worried face. But he quickly gave me a "Good job. You did well." look because he knew that it would make me feel better. I bet I still looked like a clown at that time.

We went to Redang Island together for our graduation trip. Back then, it was really cool that he has a waterproof camera that we can use to take photos underwater. I kept demanding him to take lots of photo as I couldn't bring my camera when we go for snorkelling. Taking photo is like capturing memories and Asians in general love to take photo..so I was really glad that he has that cool camera and left me with lots of photo that I can always look back to remembering the times we spent together.


Ah hah, then there was a little drama that happened at Redang Island. Teng Jong was being nice to hold my camera so he could return it to me as I left it in one of the guy's room. However, he lost it on the night before we are supposed to leave. I don't know if I scolded him or said something that upset him at that time. Being a childish me years ago, I probably would have. But I remembered that I didn't have appetite to eat breakfast and I cried that morning when we were supposed to leave. Teng Jong had this guilty face and he looked everywhere for it for a long time. He probably skipped breakfast too. Finally, it was returned to me by someone who found my camera and saw the photos of the people inside. He was so relieved afterwards.

I went to graduation ball with Teng Jong. As in he drove me to the ball (I think) and send me back home. He is always very conscious about how he looked. So he asked me for my opinion about his outfit. He cared about his hair very much so he always fix his hair in front of the mirror. He sometimes doesn't like wearing glasses when taking photos. So he would ask me if he looked better with or without glasses. To me, he still looked the same. (And I also remember that I told our lecturer that you are driving me home when he told me to "hang on tight" just because you almost hit his car at college haha).

After finishing Cambridge GCE A-levels programme, I seldom meet up with Teng Jong. He took me to swimming once but the pool was closed so we didn't get to swim. We did hang out for mamak at night maybe twice in a year? It was mainly because I went to New Zealand to further my study. One day, he told me that he had bone cancer. I thought he was joking. He always jokes around but then when I think about it, he wouldn't be joking about this kind of stuff. "Are you serious?" I asked. And I started questioning more. He said he could still cope with it, like it is painful and he is going for chemotherapy. That was probably the second last time that I seen him.

If I remembered correctly, the last time I saw him was in 2012. I was back in Malaysia for my summer break and I invited him to red carpet and cocktail party plus a movie premiere because I had extra tickets to give away. We didn't really talked much that time because it was quite a busy event and it was hard to catch up. He did told me that he completed his chemotherapy and it went well. I kinda recalled him saying that he was going overseas to further study. Actually, we may have met up at mamak in 2013. I think I told you that I got offered a place to do Master of Dietetics. When did the car plate alphabet reaches "WTJ" ? I can't remember. I know that you said you regretted that you didn't get it for your green Proton Wira, but you were thinking about saving that money for your parents.

Few months ago, he asked if I was in Malaysia. It was just the right timing because I just touched down few hours ago. And his message to me was "Find a day come yam cha ar!". I messaged him on Facebook later to ask when and how was he. He told me that he was treating his neck for the past few months and said that he could meet up during weekdays. And I did not reply him. I was in Malaysia the whole time, relaxing at home, when I could have drove to his house to meet up with him. I felt guilty. I told myself that I will meet up with him when I go back to Malaysia again.

When I was in the office, working on my thesis, I saw his Facebook status..that Teng Jong has passed away. I was shocked. I can't believe that. It was quite sudden for me. I was going to meet up with him when I go back to Malaysia. Why didn't you wait for me? And you said you will attend my wedding as well (it's gonna be ages away).  Why did you just....left? There are many things that I want to share with you and you didn't update me with the things that happened in your life. And when you said "likee! wanna ask u something!" What was it? You didn't tell me! Now you left me hanging.

My dear friend, I missed you. I was not ready to say goodbye. I think about you all the time. I thought I would be better at dealing with death after being trained in hospital setting. But I overestimated myself. Now I cannot stop crying whenever I think about you. I know you wouldn't want to see people who cared about you to feel sad when you leave. That is why you always gave the widest smile when you are going through all the pain. You wouldn't give up and want to continue chemotherapy but the doctor told you that your body cannot handle it after your first treatment. I know you tried so hard. And you didn't give up. You always inspired me and gave me strengths and hope. You did a good job. I hope I could give you the "Good job. You did well." look like how you gave it to me at the performance. I hope are you are well in another world. Our friendship is forever. You're always in my heart.

In Loving Memory of Wong Teng Jong

08.12.1991 - 03.08.2015

This is where it started,

To build the life that I wanted,

I worked and worked,

To make things worked.

Years gone by,

I still ain't no perfect,

Telling myself a lie,

To mask a fact.

Wondering where to begin,

In the middle of nowhere,

Pretend to find myself there.

Two weeks ago, I was sent up to Red Beach for my hospital placement. Prior to this, I have never heard of or been to Red Beach before. Thanks to the advance technology, I can use Google Maps to plan my journey. When I had a look at it, it says that it will take about 1 hour 10 minutes one-way. There isn't any bus stop nearby the medical centre, so I had to walk 30 minutes to the medical centre. Fortunately, my journey was cut short as my supervisor offered me a ride from the bus stop to the medical centre.

On the way home, I was confused by the bus number. There were two buses of the same number but with different places that it was heading to. The buses were an hour apart, which means if I missed one that I am supposed to ride, I will need to wait for 2 hours for the right one. What happened was that I went up to the wrong bus. Since I am not familiar with the road, I relied on my phone GPS to show me the direction. I thought I was fine because I have mobile data to chat with my friends on the bus in case I was lost!

Unexpectedly, my phone battery died. People in the bus are getting lesser and lesser. The sky was getting darker too. The road was getting hilly and narrow. I had a feeling that I am definitely in the wrong bus now. The bus eventually stopped at the final station. The bus driver asked me "are you not going to get down at this station?" I replied "I'm actually heading to Smales Farm but I think I'm lost." She was shocked. "Oh you poor thing! We are far away from Smales Farm now. We went the other way and this is the final station for this bus route." I just looked at her blankly. I was afraid. I was feeling tired as well. I was stressed with the final project work and assignments too. I can't deal with all these unnecessary stress. I just wanted to cry. At that time, I was hoping for someone to just hug me and say everything will be alright. You know how dangerous it is in Malaysia if I am in this kind of situation.

The bus driver took me down the bus and bought me a coffee. She said "everything will be fine." I am guessing that she probably noticed the word "stress" written on my face. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. When I opened my eyes, I saw this.

The view is really beautiful here. 

The sound of waves and the smell of the salty ocean is actually what I remember most from this.

After 35 minutes of wait, the bus returned to the bus stop where I got on. And she held my hand and walked me to the correct bus and notified the bus driver to drop me at Smales Farm. Although it took me 3-4 hours to get home, I have gained something. This experience made me realised that I was anxious about the future and regretted about the past events that I have neglected the present. Recalling back, I actually enjoyed the coffee and the short talk with the bus driver while having to look out at such a beautiful view. I suppose we all made mistakes, so forget about the past and move on with life. In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't make.

I hope everyone is doing well. Just dropping by for a lil update..I am back in Malaysia!! I will only be back here for a few weeks so I'll try to update and catch up as much as possible here. Things tend to get a little busier when I'm in New Zealand lol.

Earlier this year, my grandfather passed away. My family trip was cancelled and I also postponed the starting date of my course because of this reason.

I still remember the first day when I arrived at Auckland. I was nervous. Scared. Don't know if I can survive by myself. I don't really know where should I go. I found a flat on TradeMe but I don't know where is it. I kept checking the address that I wrote on my luggage tag. When queuing to clear custom, I changed to my NZ SIM card and tried to contact my friend who is supposed to picked me up. Then, I realised my phone has no credit. Luckily, there is 30 minutes free WiFi at Auckland airport! In addition, it took me almost two hours to clear custom. I was so tired at that point. My leg is still bruised from kneeling on the road as part of Chinese funeral custom. And it's all fine..because..I'm so grateful that my friend managed to find me, picked me up, took me out for a good dinner meal, brought me to groceries to get essentials and took me back to my flat.

It was approximately 10.00pm when I arrived at my flat. I was welcomed by a heart-warming couple. They were waiting for my arrival. They helped me to carry some of my stuff in, and we had a little ice-breaker session. They looked like really nice people. I was feeling tired so I excused myself to take a shower, which I have been yearning for. It struck me then, I still haven't unpack my stuff. I am starting my placement tomorrow. In my head, I'm thinking "I hope tomorrow's orientation would go well." I checked my email to find out where and what time we are meeting - it says North Shore Hospital at 8.30am. I then went to bed after having a Skype conversation with my family.

I woke up early in the morning to prepare for my orientation. At 8.00am, I checked my email just to confirm again. It says - Otago House at 8.30am. OMG. I'm in trouble! It takes me 5 minutes to walk to North Shore Hospital but 50 minutes to bus to Otago House. I immediately ran outside my flat. Then, I realised I don't know how to take a bus to Otago House. Where is the bus stop? What bus number should I take? FML. I quickly used Google Maps app on my phone and it told me to walk to somewhere (later on I realised there's a bus station nearby where I bus to most places LOL). I got on to the bus and I checked my email again. I'm screwed. The latest email actually said to meet at North Shore Hospital at 8.30am. Something was wrong with reading emails on my phone. Anyway, I got off the next station and ran to North Shore Hospital. Did I make it? YESSSSS! I was there ON TIME!
My heels hurt so bad. My flats were soaked with bloods.

But the rest was history =)

In the first half of the year, I was at Auckland the whole time for my hospital placement. And I'm proud to say that I've completed and passed every assessment in the placement! So happy =) I've met a lot of people along the way, and they have helped me to get to know myself better too. Sometimes you just need to see yourself through others. From them, I begin to noticed things that I have not thought about myself before, and this realisation changes the way that I viewed the world.

It was a tough beginning. It probably didn't start out at the best way but I think it's the process that counts. And it makes a good ending =)

I was cleaning up my closet the other day and I found a cheongsam that I bought a few years ago. And then, it struck me, I did not wear them for almost 3 years now!

(More from link)

I really like cheongsam and I hope I can wear them all the time other than during Chinese New Year. Cheongsam has always been one of the most elegant kind of dress. Since I was young, I wanted to own a cheongsam but it was too expensive for me. I like how it can create the kind of cute and sexy feeling at the same time. Fortunately, the new generation of fashion is all about the fusion of tradition and modernity. And it is even cheaper to get a cheongsam nowadays too! I am sure that cheongsam will never go out of style and you can always wear it for any events like birthday, dinner or even just a casual meet up with your friends. (Just like how I wore mine for a ball!) There are so many types of cheongsam out there now and if you are wondering where you can find modern type of cheongsam, you can try here =)

I only had own two cheongsam in my life and I am sure that there will be more to come!

Have you ever not wanted to go back to a certain place or look for that someone just because you want to remember how it was used to be?